diff --git a/Server/addrinuse.go b/Server/addrinuse.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..b5734986
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/addrinuse.go
@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+package main
+
+import "strings"
+
+// isAddrInUse reports whether err is an "address already in use" bind
+// failure. The errno check (platform files: addrinuse_unix.go /
+// addrinuse_windows.go) is authoritative; the string checks remain as a
+// fallback for errors that arrive with the errno wrapped away. String
+// matching alone was the original implementation and silently disabled the
+// bind retry on non-English Windows, where the system error text is
+// localized.
+func isAddrInUse(err error) bool {
+	if err == nil {
+		return false
+	}
+	if errnoIsAddrInUse(err) {
+		return true
+	}
+	return strings.Contains(err.Error(), "address already in use") ||
+		strings.Contains(err.Error(), "Only one usage of each socket address")
+}
diff --git a/Server/addrinuse_test.go b/Server/addrinuse_test.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..14f15ddd
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/addrinuse_test.go
@@ -0,0 +1,114 @@
+package main
+
+import (
+	"errors"
+	"fmt"
+	"io"
+	"log/slog"
+	"net"
+	"net/http"
+	"testing"
+	"time"
+)
+
+// A real double-bind must be recognized through the errno chain
+// (net.OpError → os.SyscallError → Errno) — this is what keeps the bind
+// retry alive on non-English Windows, where the old string-only match never
+// fired against localized error text.
+func TestIsAddrInUse_RealBindConflict(t *testing.T) {
+	l, err := net.Listen("tcp", "127.0.0.1:0")
+	if err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("listen: %v", err)
+	}
+	defer l.Close() //nolint:errcheck
+
+	_, err = net.Listen("tcp", l.Addr().String())
+	if err == nil {
+		t.Fatal("second listen on the same address unexpectedly succeeded")
+	}
+	if !isAddrInUse(err) {
+		t.Errorf("isAddrInUse(%v) = false, want true for a real bind conflict", err)
+	}
+}
+
+func TestIsAddrInUse_Table(t *testing.T) {
+	cases := []struct {
+		name string
+		err  error
+		want bool
+	}{
+		{"nil", nil, false},
+		{"unrelated error", errors.New("connection refused"), false},
+		{"unix string fallback", errors.New("listen tcp :8443: bind: address already in use"), true},
+		{"windows string fallback", errors.New("listen tcp :8443: bind: Only one usage of each socket address (protocol/network address/port) is normally permitted."), true},
+		{"out of range port", fmt.Errorf("listen tcp: address 99999: invalid port"), false},
+	}
+	for _, tc := range cases {
+		t.Run(tc.name, func(t *testing.T) {
+			if got := isAddrInUse(tc.err); got != tc.want {
+				t.Errorf("isAddrInUse(%v) = %v, want %v", tc.err, got, tc.want)
+			}
+		})
+	}
+}
+
+func TestServeWithBindRetry(t *testing.T) {
+	log := slog.New(slog.NewTextHandler(io.Discard, nil))
+	addrInUse := errors.New("listen tcp :1: bind: address already in use")
+
+	prevEvery := bindRetryEvery
+	bindRetryEvery = time.Millisecond
+	t.Cleanup(func() { bindRetryEvery = prevEvery })
+
+	t.Run("retries through a transient conflict", func(t *testing.T) {
+		calls := 0
+		err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "test", func() error {
+			calls++
+			if calls < 3 {
+				return addrInUse
+			}
+			return http.ErrServerClosed
+		})
+		if !errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
+			t.Errorf("err = %v, want ErrServerClosed after the conflict clears", err)
+		}
+		if calls != 3 {
+			t.Errorf("serve calls = %d, want 3", calls)
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("gives up on a non-conflict error immediately", func(t *testing.T) {
+		calls := 0
+		otherErr := errors.New("listen tcp: address 99999: invalid port")
+		err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "test", func() error {
+			calls++
+			return otherErr
+		})
+		if !errors.Is(err, otherErr) {
+			t.Errorf("err = %v, want the serve error passed through", err)
+		}
+		if calls != 1 {
+			t.Errorf("serve calls = %d, want 1 (no retry for non-conflict errors)", calls)
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("bounded attempts on a persistent conflict", func(t *testing.T) {
+		calls := 0
+		err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "test", func() error {
+			calls++
+			return addrInUse
+		})
+		if !errors.Is(err, addrInUse) {
+			t.Errorf("err = %v, want the final conflict error", err)
+		}
+		if calls != 20 {
+			t.Errorf("serve calls = %d, want exactly 20", calls)
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("clean shutdown passes through untouched", func(t *testing.T) {
+		if err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "test", func() error { return http.ErrServerClosed }); !errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
+			t.Errorf("err = %v, want ErrServerClosed", err)
+		}
+	})
+}
diff --git a/Server/addrinuse_unix.go b/Server/addrinuse_unix.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..cdcbae0f
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/addrinuse_unix.go
@@ -0,0 +1,14 @@
+//go:build !windows
+
+package main
+
+import (
+	"errors"
+	"syscall"
+)
+
+// errnoIsAddrInUse unwraps err (net.OpError → os.SyscallError → Errno) and
+// compares against EADDRINUSE.
+func errnoIsAddrInUse(err error) bool {
+	return errors.Is(err, syscall.EADDRINUSE)
+}
diff --git a/Server/addrinuse_windows.go b/Server/addrinuse_windows.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..43051780
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/addrinuse_windows.go
@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+//go:build windows
+
+package main
+
+import (
+	"errors"
+	"syscall"
+)
+
+// wsaeAddrInUse is WSAEADDRINUSE (10048), the errno a Windows bind conflict
+// actually carries. The standard syscall package does not export it (it
+// lives in golang.org/x/sys/windows, which this module does not depend on
+// directly), and syscall.EADDRINUSE on Windows is Go's distinct
+// APPLICATION_ERROR-block value that errors.Is does not map to WSA codes.
+const wsaeAddrInUse = syscall.Errno(10048)
+
+// errnoIsAddrInUse unwraps err (net.OpError → os.SyscallError → Errno) and
+// compares against both Windows bind-conflict errnos.
+func errnoIsAddrInUse(err error) bool {
+	return errors.Is(err, wsaeAddrInUse) || errors.Is(err, syscall.EADDRINUSE)
+}
diff --git a/Server/admin/export_test.go b/Server/admin/export_test.go
index 5e013739..f74a8ee7 100644
--- a/Server/admin/export_test.go
+++ b/Server/admin/export_test.go
@@ -2,6 +2,7 @@ package admin
 
 import (
 	"errors"
+	"sync"
 	"sync/atomic"
 	"time"
 
@@ -64,16 +65,65 @@ func StubCloseError(msg string) (restore func()) {
 	}
 }
 
-// ApplyStagedUpdate exposes applyStagedUpdate (the on-disk swap + respawn
-// logic behind POST /updates/apply's background goroutine) so tests can drive
-// its abort paths directly with fake filesystem paths, instead of exercising
-// the full HTTP handler — which resolves exePath via os.Executable() and
-// would rename/replace the running test binary itself.
+// ApplyStagedUpdate exposes applyStagedUpdate (the on-disk swap behind
+// POST /updates/apply's background goroutine) so tests can drive it directly
+// with fake filesystem paths, instead of exercising the full HTTP handler —
+// which resolves exePath via os.Executable() and would rename/replace the
+// running test binary itself. The swap has no process side effects anymore
+// (no spawn, no signal, no exit), so the success path is testable too.
 var ApplyStagedUpdate = applyStagedUpdate
 
+// ApplyAndRestart exposes the whole background tail (countdown broadcast →
+// swap → restart request / guard release) for tests, combined with
+// StubRestart and SetApplyRestartDelay.
+var ApplyAndRestart = applyAndRestart
+
+// SetApplyRestartDelay shrinks the client-facing restart countdown so tests
+// of applyAndRestart don't sleep the real 5 seconds.
+func SetApplyRestartDelay(d time.Duration) (restore func()) {
+	prev := applyRestartDelay
+	applyRestartDelay = d
+	return func() { applyRestartDelay = prev }
+}
+
+// ResetRestartState returns the restart-serialization guard to idle. Tests
+// that drive a restart-committing path (restore, apply success, setup
+// restart) must call it afterwards — the state is process-global and would
+// otherwise 409 every later test's request.
+func ResetRestartState() { restartState.Store(restartStateIdle) }
+
+// ForceRestartState pins the guard for conflict-path tests: busy=false sets
+// restart-pending, busy=true sets an in-flight exclusive operation.
+func ForceRestartState(busy bool) {
+	if busy {
+		restartState.Store(restartStateBusy)
+	} else {
+		restartState.Store(restartStatePending)
+	}
+}
+
+// CurrentRestartState reports the guard state by name for assertions.
+func CurrentRestartState() string {
+	switch restartState.Load() {
+	case restartStateBusy:
+		return "busy"
+	case restartStatePending:
+		return "pending"
+	default:
+		return "idle"
+	}
+}
+
+// RequestRestartForTest exposes requestRestart so the unwired default hook's
+// inertness (log, no exit, no spawn) is directly testable.
+var RequestRestartForTest = requestRestart
+
 // StubRestart replaces the process-restart hook for the duration of a test and
 // returns a func reporting whether a restart was requested. Without this the
-// restore handler would respawn and os.Exit the test binary.
+// restore handler's request would hit the unwired-hook error log; with it the
+// test can assert the request happened. The restore func also returns the
+// restart-serialization guard to idle, since any test that triggered the hook
+// has necessarily left it in restart-pending.
 func StubRestart() (restarted func() bool, restore func()) {
 	restartMu.Lock()
 	prev := restartSelf
@@ -84,5 +134,31 @@ func StubRestart() (restarted func() bool, restore func()) {
 		restartMu.Lock()
 		restartSelf = prev
 		restartMu.Unlock()
+		ResetRestartState()
 	}
 }
+
+// StubRestartCapture is StubRestart recording the reasons passed to the hook,
+// for tests that assert which path requested the restart.
+func StubRestartCapture() (reasons func() []string, restore func()) {
+	restartMu.Lock()
+	prev := restartSelf
+	var mu sync.Mutex
+	var got []string
+	restartSelf = func(reason string) {
+		mu.Lock()
+		got = append(got, reason)
+		mu.Unlock()
+	}
+	restartMu.Unlock()
+	return func() []string {
+			mu.Lock()
+			defer mu.Unlock()
+			return append([]string(nil), got...)
+		}, func() {
+			restartMu.Lock()
+			restartSelf = prev
+			restartMu.Unlock()
+			ResetRestartState()
+		}
+}
diff --git a/Server/admin/handlers_backup.go b/Server/admin/handlers_backup.go
index 90f55f44..2fda7eac 100644
--- a/Server/admin/handlers_backup.go
+++ b/Server/admin/handlers_backup.go
@@ -13,19 +13,8 @@ import (
 	"sync"
 	"time"
 
-	"syscall"
-
 	"github.com/go-chi/chi/v5"
 	"github.com/owncord/server/db"
-	"github.com/owncord/server/updater"
-)
-
-const (
-	// restartGraceDelay lets the HTTP response and the server_restart
-	// broadcast reach clients before the process goes away.
-	restartGraceDelay = 2 * time.Second
-	// shutdownGraceDelay is how long SIGTERM gets before the os.Exit backstop.
-	shutdownGraceDelay = 10 * time.Second
 )
 
 // backupBaseDir is the directory for backup files, resolved to an absolute
@@ -211,6 +200,18 @@ func handleRestoreBackup(database *db.DB, hub HubBroadcaster) http.Handler {
 			return
 		}
 
+		// Serialize against a concurrent update apply (which stages a new
+		// binary and then restarts) and an already-requested restart — a
+		// restore must not close the database out from under either. The
+		// deferred release is a busy→idle CAS, so it covers every failure
+		// return below and harmlessly no-ops once a branch has promoted the
+		// state to restart-pending via commitRestartPending.
+		if !beginRestartSensitiveOp() {
+			writeRestartConflict(w)
+			return
+		}
+		defer abortRestartSensitiveOp()
+
 		if _, err := os.Stat(target); os.IsNotExist(err) { //nolint:gosec // G703: path sanitized by HasPrefix check above
 			writeErr(w, http.StatusNotFound, "NOT_FOUND", "backup not found")
 			return
@@ -276,13 +277,14 @@ func handleRestoreBackup(database *db.DB, hub HubBroadcaster) http.Handler {
 			// database.Close() closes the writer and reader pools regardless of
 			// the error it returns (Server/db/db.go), so this process cannot
 			// serve anything more either way — every other failure path below
-			// (copyFile failing, and the success path itself) respawns for
+			// (copyFile failing, and the success path itself) restarts for
 			// exactly that reason. The live database file is still intact here
-			// (copyFile hasn't run yet), so the respawned process comes back on
+			// (copyFile hasn't run yet), so the restarted process comes back on
 			// the pre-restore data rather than leaving clients pinned on
 			// "Reconnecting..." against a process that never actually restarts.
 			slog.Error("failed to close database before restore — restarting anyway, DB pools are closed either way", "err", err)
 			writeErr(w, http.StatusInternalServerError, "INTERNAL_ERROR", "failed to close database")
+			commitRestartPending()
 			go requestRestart("backup_restore_close_failed")
 			return
 		}
@@ -304,8 +306,9 @@ func handleRestoreBackup(database *db.DB, hub HubBroadcaster) http.Handler {
 			}
 			writeErr(w, http.StatusInternalServerError, "INTERNAL_ERROR", msg)
 			// The database was closed before the copy: this process cannot serve
-			// anything more either way, so it must respawn exactly as it does on
+			// anything more either way, so it must restart exactly as it does on
 			// the success path.
+			commitRestartPending()
 			go requestRestart("backup_restore_failed")
 			return
 		}
@@ -321,19 +324,12 @@ func handleRestoreBackup(database *db.DB, hub HubBroadcaster) http.Handler {
 		// this process can serve nothing more. It used to stop here, leaving a
 		// live server answering every request against a closed DB while the
 		// response and the restart broadcast both claimed a restart was
-		// happening. Respawn for real, the same way applying an update does.
+		// happening. Restart for real, the same way applying an update does.
+		commitRestartPending()
 		go requestRestart("backup_restore")
 	})
 }
 
-// restartSelf is the process-restart hook, swappable in tests (which must not
-// respawn or exit the test binary). Guarded because the swap happens on the
-// test goroutine while the restore handler reads it from its own.
-var (
-	restartMu   sync.Mutex
-	restartSelf = restartProcess
-)
-
 // dbCloser is swappable in tests to simulate database.Close() returning an
 // error. modernc.org/sqlite's sqlite3_close_v2 essentially never fails on a
 // normally-open connection, so there is no portable way to provoke a genuine
@@ -353,44 +349,6 @@ func closeDatabase(database *db.DB) error {
 	return fn(database)
 }
 
-// requestRestart invokes the current restart hook.
-func requestRestart(reason string) {
-	restartMu.Lock()
-	fn := restartSelf
-	restartMu.Unlock()
-	fn(reason)
-}
-
-// restartProcess spawns a fresh copy of this server and shuts the current one
-// down. Mirrors the update-apply path (update_handlers.go): SIGTERM first so
-// main.go's graceful shutdown runs, os.Exit as the backstop.
-func restartProcess(reason string) {
-	// Give the HTTP response and the restart broadcast a moment to flush.
-	time.Sleep(restartGraceDelay)
-
-	exePath, err := os.Executable()
-	if err != nil {
-		slog.Error("restart: cannot determine executable path — manual restart required",
-			"reason", reason, "error", err)
-		return
-	}
-	if resolved, symErr := filepath.EvalSymlinks(exePath); symErr == nil {
-		exePath = resolved
-	}
-	if err := updater.SpawnDetached(exePath, os.Args[1:]); err != nil {
-		slog.Error("restart: spawning the replacement process failed — manual restart required",
-			"reason", reason, "error", err)
-		return
-	}
-
-	slog.Info("restart: replacement process spawned, shutting down", "reason", reason)
-	if p, findErr := os.FindProcess(os.Getpid()); findErr == nil {
-		_ = p.Signal(syscall.SIGTERM)
-		time.Sleep(shutdownGraceDelay)
-	}
-	os.Exit(0) //nolint:gocritic // backstop if the SIGTERM handler didn't exit
-}
-
 // copyBackupFile is the restore path's file-copy hook. It exists as a var so
 // tests can inject the hard-to-simulate mid-copy failure (truncate-then-fail)
 // the rollback branch exists for; production never swaps it.
diff --git a/Server/admin/restart.go b/Server/admin/restart.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..51e66bb2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/admin/restart.go
@@ -0,0 +1,112 @@
+package admin
+
+import (
+	"log/slog"
+	"net/http"
+	"sync"
+	"sync/atomic"
+)
+
+// The admin panel has three actions that end in a process restart: applying a
+// server update, restoring a database backup, and finishing the setup wizard
+// with listener-affecting changes. None of them stop or spawn processes
+// directly — they request a restart through the hook below, and the main
+// package performs the actual work: trigger the same graceful drain a SIGTERM
+// would (which also works on Windows, where a process cannot signal itself),
+// and only after run() has fully torn down either spawn the replacement
+// binary or exit for the process supervisor to relaunch, per
+// server.restart_mode (see Server/restart.go).
+
+// restartSelf is the process-restart request hook. Swapped by
+// SetRestartHandoff at startup and by tests (StubRestart); the default logs
+// loudly instead of exiting, so a mis-wired binary degrades to "restart
+// manually" rather than to a silent no-op or a test-killing os.Exit.
+var (
+	restartMu   sync.Mutex
+	restartSelf = restartUnwired
+)
+
+func restartUnwired(reason string) {
+	slog.Error("restart requested but no restart coordinator is wired — restart the server manually",
+		"reason", reason)
+}
+
+// SetRestartHandoff wires restart requests to the main package's restart
+// coordinator. Call once at startup, before the router serves (main.go, next
+// to SetDatabasePath).
+func SetRestartHandoff(fn func(reason string)) {
+	restartMu.Lock()
+	restartSelf = fn
+	restartMu.Unlock()
+}
+
+// requestRestart invokes the current restart hook.
+func requestRestart(reason string) {
+	restartMu.Lock()
+	fn := restartSelf
+	restartMu.Unlock()
+	fn(reason)
+}
+
+// restartState serializes the restart-ending admin actions against each
+// other. Two problems it closes: concurrent update applies raced the same
+// staged .new file (each download deletes the other's staged file, and the
+// loser broadcast a spurious update_aborted to every client while a restart
+// was actually happening), and a restore could tear the database down under
+// an apply that had already responded 200.
+//
+//	idle ──beginRestartSensitiveOp──▶ busy ──commitRestartPending──▶ pending
+//	  ▲                                │
+//	  └────abortRestartSensitiveOp─────┘
+//
+// pending is terminal: it means a restart request has been (or is about to
+// be) issued and only the process replacement clears it. Ownership of the
+// busy state transfers to the background goroutine that finishes the work —
+// the HTTP handler responds while the state is still busy, so it must NOT
+// defer a reset.
+const (
+	restartStateIdle    int32 = 0
+	restartStateBusy    int32 = 1 // an update apply or restore is in flight
+	restartStatePending int32 = 2 // a restart has been requested
+)
+
+var restartState atomic.Int32
+
+// beginRestartSensitiveOp claims the exclusive restart-sensitive slot.
+// Callers that fail any later step must release it with
+// abortRestartSensitiveOp; callers that reach the point of no return promote
+// it with commitRestartPending.
+func beginRestartSensitiveOp() bool {
+	return restartState.CompareAndSwap(restartStateIdle, restartStateBusy)
+}
+
+// abortRestartSensitiveOp releases the slot after a failed operation. CAS,
+// not a blind store: an abort must never demote an already-pending restart.
+func abortRestartSensitiveOp() {
+	restartState.CompareAndSwap(restartStateBusy, restartStateIdle)
+}
+
+// commitRestartPending marks the process as committed to restarting.
+func commitRestartPending() {
+	restartState.Store(restartStatePending)
+}
+
+// tryDirectRestartPending is commitRestartPending for paths with no failable
+// work between claiming the slot and requesting the restart (setup wizard):
+// idle → pending in one step. Reports whether the claim won.
+func tryDirectRestartPending() bool {
+	return restartState.CompareAndSwap(restartStateIdle, restartStatePending)
+}
+
+// writeRestartConflict answers a request that lost to an in-flight
+// restart-sensitive operation, distinguishing "busy, try again shortly" from
+// "the process is about to be replaced".
+func writeRestartConflict(w http.ResponseWriter) {
+	if restartState.Load() == restartStatePending {
+		writeErr(w, http.StatusConflict, "RESTART_PENDING",
+			"the server is restarting — retry after it comes back")
+		return
+	}
+	writeErr(w, http.StatusConflict, "UPDATE_IN_PROGRESS",
+		"another update or restore is already in progress")
+}
diff --git a/Server/admin/restart_guard_test.go b/Server/admin/restart_guard_test.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..2768a1ab
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/admin/restart_guard_test.go
@@ -0,0 +1,263 @@
+package admin_test
+
+import (
+	"context"
+	"crypto/sha256"
+	"encoding/hex"
+	"encoding/json"
+	"net/http"
+	"os"
+	"path/filepath"
+	"testing"
+	"time"
+
+	"github.com/owncord/server/admin"
+	"github.com/owncord/server/updater"
+)
+
+// ─── The restart handoff: swap success paths and the serialization guard ────
+//
+// applyStagedUpdate no longer spawns, signals, or exits — the restart goes
+// through the coordinator hook (admin.SetRestartHandoff) and the main package
+// performs the drain + handoff. That is what makes the success paths below
+// testable at all, and the three-state guard (idle → busy → restart-pending)
+// is what keeps concurrent applies/restores/restarts from racing each other.
+
+// stageFakeUpdate lays out a fake current binary and a staged .new whose
+// hash matches, returning the three paths plus the staged hash.
+func stageFakeUpdate(t *testing.T) (exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash string) {
+	t.Helper()
+	dir := t.TempDir()
+	exePath = filepath.Join(dir, "chatserver")
+	oldPath = exePath + ".old"
+	newPath = exePath + ".new"
+	if err := os.WriteFile(exePath, []byte("old binary"), 0o755); err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("writing fake exe: %v", err)
+	}
+	staged := []byte("verified staged bytes")
+	if err := os.WriteFile(newPath, staged, 0o755); err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("writing staged binary: %v", err)
+	}
+	sum := sha256.Sum256(staged)
+	return exePath, oldPath, newPath, hex.EncodeToString(sum[:])
+}
+
+// The success path: the verified staged binary ends up at exePath, the
+// previous binary at .old, no corrective broadcast is sent, and the swap
+// reports committed.
+func TestApplyStagedUpdate_Success_SwapsWithoutAbortBroadcast(t *testing.T) {
+	exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash := stageFakeUpdate(t)
+
+	hub := &mockHub{}
+	if !admin.ApplyStagedUpdate(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash) {
+		t.Fatal("ApplyStagedUpdate = false, want committed swap")
+	}
+
+	if len(hub.restartCalls) != 0 {
+		t.Errorf("restartCalls = %+v, want none (no corrective broadcast on success)", hub.restartCalls)
+	}
+	if got, err := os.ReadFile(exePath); err != nil || string(got) != "verified staged bytes" {
+		t.Errorf("exePath contents = %q, err=%v; want the staged bytes", got, err)
+	}
+	if got, err := os.ReadFile(oldPath); err != nil || string(got) != "old binary" {
+		t.Errorf(".old contents = %q, err=%v; want the previous binary", got, err)
+	}
+	if _, err := os.Stat(newPath); !os.IsNotExist(err) {
+		t.Errorf(".new still exists after commit (stat err=%v)", err)
+	}
+}
+
+// The full background tail on success: countdown broadcast, swap, guard
+// promoted to restart-pending, restart requested through the hook with
+// reason "update".
+func TestApplyAndRestart_Success_RequestsRestartAndMarksPending(t *testing.T) {
+	exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash := stageFakeUpdate(t)
+
+	admin.ResetRestartState()
+	admin.ForceRestartState(true) // the handler claims busy before spawning the goroutine
+	reasons, restoreHook := admin.StubRestartCapture()
+	defer restoreHook()
+	defer admin.SetApplyRestartDelay(time.Millisecond)()
+
+	hub := &mockHub{}
+	admin.ApplyAndRestart(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash)
+
+	if len(hub.restartCalls) != 1 || hub.restartCalls[0].reason != "update" {
+		t.Fatalf("restartCalls = %+v, want exactly the update countdown", hub.restartCalls)
+	}
+	if got := reasons(); len(got) != 1 || got[0] != "update" {
+		t.Errorf("restart hook reasons = %v, want [update]", got)
+	}
+	if got := admin.CurrentRestartState(); got != "pending" {
+		t.Errorf("restart state after committed swap = %q, want pending", got)
+	}
+}
+
+// The background tail on a failed swap: corrective broadcast (covered in
+// depth by the OC-0226 tests), no restart request, and the busy slot released
+// so a corrected release can be applied without a manual restart.
+func TestApplyAndRestart_Abort_ReleasesGuard(t *testing.T) {
+	dir := t.TempDir()
+	exePath := filepath.Join(dir, "chatserver")
+	oldPath := exePath + ".old"
+	newPath := exePath + ".new" // never written → re-verification fails
+
+	admin.ResetRestartState()
+	admin.ForceRestartState(true)
+	reasons, restoreHook := admin.StubRestartCapture()
+	defer restoreHook()
+	defer admin.SetApplyRestartDelay(time.Millisecond)()
+
+	hub := &mockHub{}
+	admin.ApplyAndRestart(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath,
+		"0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000")
+
+	if got := reasons(); len(got) != 0 {
+		t.Errorf("restart hook reasons = %v, want none on abort", got)
+	}
+	if got := admin.CurrentRestartState(); got != "idle" {
+		t.Errorf("restart state after aborted swap = %q, want idle (slot released)", got)
+	}
+	if len(hub.restartCalls) != 2 || hub.restartCalls[1].reason != "update_aborted" {
+		t.Errorf("restartCalls = %+v, want countdown then update_aborted", hub.restartCalls)
+	}
+}
+
+// POST /updates/apply answers 409 without touching the updater when a restart
+// is already pending or another restart-sensitive operation is in flight.
+// The guard sits before CheckForUpdate, so no GitHub call is attempted — the
+// updater here has no reachable base URL and would error loudly if consulted.
+func TestApplyUpdate_Conflict409(t *testing.T) {
+	t.Setenv("OWNCORD_CONTAINER", "0")
+	database := openAdminTestDB(t)
+	u := updater.NewUpdater("1.0.0", "", "J3vb", "OwnCord")
+	handler := admin.NewAdminAPI(database, "1.0.0", nil, u, nil, nil, nil, newTestModService(database), newTestRoleService(database))
+	token := createAdminUser(t, database)
+
+	cases := []struct {
+		name     string
+		busy     bool
+		wantCode string
+	}{
+		{"restart pending", false, "RESTART_PENDING"},
+		{"apply or restore in flight", true, "UPDATE_IN_PROGRESS"},
+	}
+	for _, tc := range cases {
+		t.Run(tc.name, func(t *testing.T) {
+			admin.ForceRestartState(tc.busy)
+			t.Cleanup(admin.ResetRestartState)
+
+			w := doRequest(t, handler, http.MethodPost, "/updates/apply", token, nil)
+			if w.Code != http.StatusConflict {
+				t.Fatalf("status = %d, want 409; body: %s", w.Code, w.Body.String())
+			}
+			var resp map[string]string
+			if err := json.Unmarshal(w.Body.Bytes(), &resp); err != nil {
+				t.Fatalf("unmarshal: %v", err)
+			}
+			if resp["error"] != tc.wantCode {
+				t.Errorf("error code = %q, want %q", resp["error"], tc.wantCode)
+			}
+		})
+	}
+}
+
+// POST /backups/{name}/restore refuses the same way — before any disk I/O.
+func TestRestoreBackup_Conflict409(t *testing.T) {
+	database := openAdminTestDB(t)
+	handler := admin.NewAdminAPI(database, "1.0.0", &mockHub{}, nil, nil, nil, nil, newTestModService(database), newTestRoleService(database))
+	token := createAdminUser(t, database)
+
+	admin.ForceRestartState(false) // restart pending
+	t.Cleanup(admin.ResetRestartState)
+
+	w := doRequest(t, handler, http.MethodPost, "/backups/chatserver_x.db/restore", token, nil)
+	if w.Code != http.StatusConflict {
+		t.Fatalf("status = %d, want 409; body: %s", w.Code, w.Body.String())
+	}
+	var resp map[string]string
+	if err := json.Unmarshal(w.Body.Bytes(), &resp); err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("unmarshal: %v", err)
+	}
+	if resp["error"] != "RESTART_PENDING" {
+		t.Errorf("error code = %q, want RESTART_PENDING", resp["error"])
+	}
+}
+
+// A restore whose database.Close() fails is still committed to dying: it must
+// request a restart AND leave the guard in restart-pending so nothing else
+// starts an update against a process with closed DB pools.
+func TestRestore_CloseFailure_StillMarksPendingAndRequestsRestart(t *testing.T) {
+	tmpDir := chdirTemp(t)
+	database := openAdminTestDB(t)
+	handler := admin.NewAdminAPI(database, "1.0.0", &mockHub{}, nil, nil, nil, nil, newTestModService(database), newTestRoleService(database))
+	token := createAdminUser(t, database)
+
+	backupDir := filepath.Join(tmpDir, "data", "backups")
+	if err := os.MkdirAll(backupDir, 0o750); err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("MkdirAll backups: %v", err)
+	}
+	backupName := "chatserver_20240101_120000.db"
+	if err := database.BackupToSafe(context.Background(), filepath.Join(backupDir, backupName), backupDir); err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("BackupToSafe fixture: %v", err)
+	}
+
+	reasons, restoreHook := admin.StubRestartCapture()
+	defer restoreHook()
+	restoreClose := admin.StubCloseError("injected close failure")
+	defer restoreClose()
+
+	w := doRequest(t, handler, http.MethodPost, "/backups/"+backupName+"/restore", token, nil)
+	if w.Code != http.StatusInternalServerError {
+		t.Fatalf("status = %d, want 500; body: %s", w.Code, w.Body.String())
+	}
+
+	deadline := time.Now().Add(2 * time.Second)
+	for len(reasons()) == 0 && time.Now().Before(deadline) {
+		time.Sleep(10 * time.Millisecond)
+	}
+	if got := reasons(); len(got) != 1 || got[0] != "backup_restore_close_failed" {
+		t.Errorf("restart hook reasons = %v, want [backup_restore_close_failed]", got)
+	}
+	if got := admin.CurrentRestartState(); got != "pending" {
+		t.Errorf("restart state = %q, want pending (process is committed to dying)", got)
+	}
+}
+
+// A setup-wizard restart is skipped (with the response already written) when
+// an update or restore already owns the restart: two restart paths must never
+// race each other's teardown.
+func TestSetupRestart_SkippedWhenPending(t *testing.T) {
+	database := openAdminTestDB(t)
+	cfgPath := filepath.Join(t.TempDir(), "config.yaml")
+	restarted := make(chan string, 1)
+	handler := wizardHandler(t, database, cfgPath, restarted)
+
+	admin.ForceRestartState(false) // restart pending
+
+	rr := doRequest(t, handler, "POST", "/setup", "", map[string]any{
+		"username": "owner",
+		"password": "SecurePass123!",
+		"wizard": map[string]any{
+			"server_name": "S",
+			"port":        9000,
+			"tls_mode":    "off",
+		},
+	})
+	if rr.Code != http.StatusCreated {
+		t.Fatalf("POST /setup = %d, want 201; body=%s", rr.Code, rr.Body.String())
+	}
+
+	select {
+	case reason := <-restarted:
+		t.Errorf("setup requested restart %q despite a pending restart", reason)
+	case <-time.After(200 * time.Millisecond):
+	}
+}
+
+// The unwired default hook must degrade to a loud log — never exit, spawn,
+// or panic — so a binary that misses the SetRestartHandoff wiring (or a test
+// that forgets to stub) fails soft.
+func TestRequestRestart_UnwiredDefaultIsInert(t *testing.T) {
+	admin.RequestRestartForTest("unwired-test")
+}
diff --git a/Server/admin/setup_handler.go b/Server/admin/setup_handler.go
index 0fbb850e..b8808085 100644
--- a/Server/admin/setup_handler.go
+++ b/Server/admin/setup_handler.go
@@ -254,9 +254,16 @@ func handleSetup(database *db.DB, limiter *auth.RateLimiter, allowedOrigins []st
 
 		// Restart after the response is written so the browser receives the
 		// token and the reconnect URL. Mirrors handleRestoreBackup /
-		// handleApplyUpdate: broadcast, then respawn in a goroutine
-		// (requestRestart sleeps a grace delay before acting).
+		// handleApplyUpdate: broadcast, then request the restart in a
+		// goroutine — main.go drains the server and performs the handoff.
+		// tryDirectRestartPending loses only to an already in-flight update
+		// or restore, which will itself restart the process; skipping is
+		// correct then (the response above is already written either way).
 		if restartRequired {
+			if !tryDirectRestartPending() {
+				slog.Warn("setup restart skipped: another restart-sensitive operation is already in progress")
+				return
+			}
 			if hub != nil {
 				hub.BroadcastServerRestart("setup", restartBroadcastDelaySeconds)
 			}
diff --git a/Server/admin/setup_wizard_test.go b/Server/admin/setup_wizard_test.go
index 0cd23839..a7faba49 100644
--- a/Server/admin/setup_wizard_test.go
+++ b/Server/admin/setup_wizard_test.go
@@ -33,9 +33,13 @@ func wizardRunningCfg() *config.Config {
 }
 
 // wizardHandler builds the admin API with wizard options and a restart stub
-// that signals restarted (buffered) instead of respawning the process.
+// that signals restarted (buffered) instead of restarting the process. A
+// wizard run that triggers a restart leaves the process-global
+// restart-serialization guard in restart-pending, so it is reset after every
+// wizard test.
 func wizardHandler(t *testing.T, database *db.DB, cfgPath string, restarted chan string) http.Handler {
 	t.Helper()
+	t.Cleanup(admin.ResetRestartState)
 	return admin.NewAdminAPI(database, "1.0.0", nil, nil, nil, nil, nil, newTestModService(database), newTestRoleService(database),
 		admin.SetupOptions{
 			ConfigPath: cfgPath,
diff --git a/Server/admin/update_handlers.go b/Server/admin/update_handlers.go
index 95c021b0..a77bbb3e 100644
--- a/Server/admin/update_handlers.go
+++ b/Server/admin/update_handlers.go
@@ -6,7 +6,6 @@ import (
 	"net/http"
 	"os"
 	"path/filepath"
-	"syscall"
 	"time"
 
 	"github.com/owncord/server/updater"
@@ -35,6 +34,11 @@ func handleCheckUpdate(u *updater.Updater) http.HandlerFunc {
 	}
 }
 
+// applyRestartDelay is how long the "restarting in 5s" countdown broadcast to
+// clients actually gets before the swap + restart request. A var so tests can
+// shrink it; the broadcast countdown below stays 5 to match this value.
+var applyRestartDelay = 5 * time.Second
+
 // handleApplyUpdate downloads and applies a server update.
 func handleApplyUpdate(u *updater.Updater, hub HubBroadcaster, _ string) http.Handler {
 	return http.HandlerFunc(func(w http.ResponseWriter, r *http.Request) {
@@ -52,6 +56,24 @@ func handleApplyUpdate(u *updater.Updater, hub HubBroadcaster, _ string) http.Ha
 			return
 		}
 
+		// Serialize against concurrent applies, restores, and an
+		// already-requested restart — claimed before any updater work so a
+		// pending restart answers 409 without an outbound GitHub call, and
+		// so two concurrent applies can never both stage into the same .new
+		// path (each download removes the other's staged file). The deferred
+		// release covers every early return; ownership transfers to the
+		// applyAndRestart goroutine at the bottom.
+		if !beginRestartSensitiveOp() {
+			writeRestartConflict(w)
+			return
+		}
+		claimed := true
+		defer func() {
+			if claimed {
+				abortRestartSensitiveOp()
+			}
+		}()
+
 		// Check for available update.
 		info, err := u.CheckForUpdate(r.Context())
 		if err != nil {
@@ -94,7 +116,7 @@ func handleApplyUpdate(u *updater.Updater, hub HubBroadcaster, _ string) http.Ha
 		// DownloadAndVerify stages the binary and returns its trusted hash
 		// (bound to the signed release manifest). The apply goroutine below
 		// re-verifies the staged file against this hash through an open
-		// handle — never by path — before the rename+spawn.
+		// handle — never by path — before the rename.
 		stagedHash, err := u.DownloadAndVerify(ctx, info.Latest, info.DownloadURL, info.ChecksumURL, info.SignatureURL, info.ManifestURL, info.ManifestSignatureURL, newPath)
 		if err != nil {
 			slog.Error("update download/verify failed", "err", err)
@@ -108,41 +130,54 @@ func handleApplyUpdate(u *updater.Updater, hub HubBroadcaster, _ string) http.Ha
 			"version": info.Latest,
 		})
 
-		// Broadcast restart notification and apply in background.
-		go func() {
-			if hub != nil {
-				hub.BroadcastServerRestart("update", 5)
-			}
-			time.Sleep(5 * time.Second)
-			if applyStagedUpdate(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash) {
-				// Every deferred cleanup inside applyStagedUpdate has run by
-				// now, which is why the exit lives out here.
-				os.Exit(0) // fallback if the SIGTERM handler didn't exit
-			}
-		}()
+		// Broadcast the restart countdown and finish in the background — the
+		// goroutine takes over the busy state claimed above, so the deferred
+		// release must stand down.
+		claimed = false
+		go applyAndRestart(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash)
 	})
 }
 
-// applyStagedUpdate performs the on-disk swap (verified staged binary ->
-// exePath) and spawns the replacement process. The caller has already
-// broadcast "restarting in 5s" to every connected client before invoking
-// this, so every return path that does NOT end in a successful respawn must
-// correct that promise — otherwise the client's restart banner counts down
-// to a permanent "Reconnecting..." over a connection that never actually
-// dropped (OC-0226). The deferred broadcast below covers all such paths
-// (verification failure, rename failure, commit failure, spawn failure) with
-// one guard instead of one broadcast per failure branch; it is cancelled by
-// setting restarting=true immediately before the process commits to
-// respawning.
-// It reports whether the process is committed to exiting for the replacement.
-// The exit itself belongs to the caller: calling os.Exit here would skip both
-// deferred cleanups below (the staged-file handle and the corrective
-// broadcast), and on Windows releasing that handle is the very thing the
-// restart is for.
+// applyAndRestart is POST /updates/apply's background tail: give clients the
+// promised countdown, swap the binary on disk, and hand the process over to
+// the main package's restart coordinator. On a failed swap it releases the
+// exclusive slot claimed by the handler so a corrected release can be applied
+// without a manual restart (the corrective update_aborted broadcast is sent
+// by applyStagedUpdate's deferred guard).
+func applyAndRestart(hub HubBroadcaster, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash string) {
+	if hub != nil {
+		hub.BroadcastServerRestart("update", 5)
+	}
+	time.Sleep(applyRestartDelay)
+	if applyStagedUpdate(hub, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash) {
+		commitRestartPending()
+		requestRestart("update")
+		return
+	}
+	abortRestartSensitiveOp()
+}
+
+// applyStagedUpdate performs the on-disk swap: verified staged binary ->
+// exePath, previous binary -> .old. It reports whether the swap committed —
+// on true the caller must request a restart, because the file at exePath is
+// no longer the binary this process is running.
+//
+// The caller has already broadcast "restarting in 5s" to every connected
+// client before invoking this, so every failure path must correct that
+// promise — otherwise the client's restart banner counts down to a permanent
+// "Reconnecting..." over a connection that never actually dropped (OC-0226).
+// The deferred broadcast below covers all such paths (verification failure,
+// rename failure, commit failure) with one guard; it is cancelled by setting
+// committed=true once the verified binary is in place.
+//
+// It does NOT spawn, signal, or exit: the restart itself is the main
+// package's job, after run() has fully drained (Server/restart.go). Keeping
+// the swap free of process side effects is also what makes the success path
+// unit-testable.
 func applyStagedUpdate(hub HubBroadcaster, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash string) bool {
-	restarting := false
+	committed := false
 	defer func() {
-		if !restarting && hub != nil {
+		if !committed && hub != nil {
 			hub.BroadcastServerRestart("update_aborted", 0)
 		}
 	}()
@@ -150,7 +185,7 @@ func applyStagedUpdate(hub HubBroadcaster, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash
 	// TOCTOU guard: open the staged binary once, verify its hash
 	// through that handle, and commit (rename) that exact file.
 	// Commit fails if the path was swapped after verification, so
-	// the bytes verified are the bytes spawned.
+	// the bytes verified are the bytes the restart will execute.
 	staged, err := updater.OpenVerifiedBinary(newPath, stagedHash)
 	if err != nil {
 		slog.Error("update: staged binary re-verification failed, aborting update", "error", err)
@@ -176,27 +211,7 @@ func applyStagedUpdate(hub HubBroadcaster, exePath, oldPath, newPath, stagedHash
 		return false
 	}
 
-	// Spawn new process.
-	if err := updater.SpawnDetached(exePath, os.Args[1:]); err != nil {
-		slog.Error("update: spawn new process failed", "error", err)
-		return false
-	}
-
-	// The replacement process is spawned: from here on this process is
-	// committed to shutting down for it, so the "restarting" promise made at
-	// the top of handleApplyUpdate's goroutine is about to come true. Cancel
-	// the deferred corrective broadcast.
-	restarting = true
-
-	// Signal the process to shut down gracefully before exiting.
-	// We use SIGTERM on Unix to trigger the graceful shutdown handler
-	// in main.go. On Windows, os.Exit is unavoidable because the
-	// process must release its file lock on the binary.
-	slog.Info("update: new process spawned, shutting down current process")
-	if p, err := os.FindProcess(os.Getpid()); err == nil {
-		_ = p.Signal(syscall.SIGTERM)
-		// Give graceful shutdown a few seconds before force-killing.
-		time.Sleep(10 * time.Second)
-	}
+	committed = true
+	slog.Info("update: staged binary committed — requesting restart", "path", exePath)
 	return true
 }
diff --git a/Server/admin/update_handlers_test.go b/Server/admin/update_handlers_test.go
index db90f109..f855354a 100644
--- a/Server/admin/update_handlers_test.go
+++ b/Server/admin/update_handlers_test.go
@@ -418,8 +418,9 @@ func TestAdminAPI_ApplyUpdate_ContainerOptOut(t *testing.T) {
 // "Reconnecting..." state) with no corrective signal ever sent. These tests
 // call the swap logic directly — admin.ApplyStagedUpdate — with inputs
 // engineered to fail at different points, and assert a corrective
-// "update_aborted" broadcast follows. They deliberately do not exercise the
-// success path: that ends in os.Exit(0), which would kill the test binary.
+// "update_aborted" broadcast follows. The success path is covered too, now
+// that the swap has no process side effects (the restart happens through the
+// coordinator hook, not an in-package spawn + os.Exit).
 
 // TestApplyStagedUpdate_VerifyFails_BroadcastsAbort covers the earliest abort
 // point: the staged binary re-verification (OpenVerifiedBinary) fails
diff --git a/Server/config/config.go b/Server/config/config.go
index 0f24debb..862cd9a5 100644
--- a/Server/config/config.go
+++ b/Server/config/config.go
@@ -200,6 +200,19 @@ type ServerConfig struct {
 	// longer has to be added to the ADMIN allowlist. Empty (default) falls
 	// back to AdminAllowedCIDRs.
 	LiveKitWebhookAllowedCIDRs []string `koanf:"livekit_webhook_allowed_cidrs"`
+	// RestartMode selects how a self-restart (update apply, backup restore,
+	// setup wizard) hands the process over to its replacement once the server
+	// has fully drained:
+	//   - "supervised": exit cleanly and rely on the process supervisor
+	//     (systemd Restart=, NSSM AppExit, Docker restart policy) to relaunch.
+	//   - "spawn": start the replacement binary directly before exiting
+	//     (unmanaged deployments: console, Task Scheduler).
+	//   - "auto" (default): "supervised" when a supervisor or container is
+	//     detected (updater.RunningUnderSupervisor / RunningInContainer),
+	//     otherwise "spawn".
+	// Env override: OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE. NSSM deployments must set
+	// this to "supervised" — NSSM 2.24 is not auto-detectable.
+	RestartMode string `koanf:"restart_mode"`
 }
 
 // MetricsCIDRs returns the effective allowlist for the metrics surfaces.
@@ -290,7 +303,8 @@ func defaults() Config {
 				"192.168.0.0/16", // private class C
 				"fc00::/7",       // IPv6 unique local
 			},
-			WAFCRSMode: "detect",
+			WAFCRSMode:  "detect",
+			RestartMode: "auto",
 		},
 		Database: DatabaseConfig{
 			Type: "sqlite",
@@ -369,6 +383,11 @@ server:
   # waf_paranoia_level: 2     # OWASP CRS paranoia level 1-4
   # waf_crs_mode: "detect"    # off | detect | block — CRS layer mode; "detect" logs
   #                           # CRS matches without blocking (safe default for chat traffic)
+  # restart_mode: "auto"      # auto | spawn | supervised — how self-restarts (update,
+  #                           # restore, setup wizard) hand off. "supervised" exits and
+  #                           # lets systemd/NSSM/Docker relaunch; "spawn" starts the
+  #                           # replacement directly; "auto" detects (NSSM users: set
+  #                           # "supervised" explicitly, NSSM is not auto-detectable)
 
 database:
   type: "sqlite"          # "sqlite" is the only supported backend
diff --git a/Server/config/config_test.go b/Server/config/config_test.go
index 19a1925e..43201fc1 100644
--- a/Server/config/config_test.go
+++ b/Server/config/config_test.go
@@ -505,3 +505,45 @@ func TestLoadEnvOverride_EventPersistence(t *testing.T) {
 		t.Errorf("EventPersistence.RetentionHours = %d, want 48", cfg.EventPersistence.RetentionHours)
 	}
 }
+
+func TestLoadRestartMode(t *testing.T) {
+	// server.restart_mode drives the self-restart handoff (see main.go's
+	// resolveRestartMode): default "auto", overridable via YAML and via
+	// OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE — the env case pins envKeyToKoanf's
+	// server_restart_mode -> server.restart_mode mapping.
+	t.Run("default", func(t *testing.T) {
+		cfg, err := config.Load(filepath.Join(t.TempDir(), "config.yaml"))
+		if err != nil {
+			t.Fatalf("Load() returned error: %v", err)
+		}
+		if cfg.Server.RestartMode != "auto" {
+			t.Errorf("Server.RestartMode = %q, want %q", cfg.Server.RestartMode, "auto")
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("yaml override", func(t *testing.T) {
+		cfgPath := filepath.Join(t.TempDir(), "config.yaml")
+		yaml := "server:\n  restart_mode: \"supervised\"\n"
+		if err := os.WriteFile(cfgPath, []byte(yaml), 0o644); err != nil {
+			t.Fatalf("failed to write yaml: %v", err)
+		}
+		cfg, err := config.Load(cfgPath)
+		if err != nil {
+			t.Fatalf("Load() returned error: %v", err)
+		}
+		if cfg.Server.RestartMode != "supervised" {
+			t.Errorf("Server.RestartMode = %q, want %q", cfg.Server.RestartMode, "supervised")
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("env override", func(t *testing.T) {
+		t.Setenv("OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE", "spawn")
+		cfg, err := config.Load(filepath.Join(t.TempDir(), "config.yaml"))
+		if err != nil {
+			t.Fatalf("Load() returned error: %v", err)
+		}
+		if cfg.Server.RestartMode != "spawn" {
+			t.Errorf("Server.RestartMode = %q, want %q", cfg.Server.RestartMode, "spawn")
+		}
+	})
+}
diff --git a/Server/db/lockfile.go b/Server/db/lockfile.go
index 0a25b252..ab0ae4c1 100644
--- a/Server/db/lockfile.go
+++ b/Server/db/lockfile.go
@@ -18,12 +18,14 @@ func lockFilePath(dbPath string) string { return dbPath + ".lock" }
 // acquireProcessLock takes the single-process lock for dbPath, retrying for
 // a bounded window before giving up with errAlreadyLocked.
 //
-// The retry exists for the restart handoff: self-update and backup-restore
-// spawn the replacement process while the old one is still draining (worst
-// case ~12s — restartProcess SIGTERMs itself and hard-exits after a 10s
-// grace), so the successor must wait for the lock rather than die on it.
-// A genuinely concurrent long-lived second process still fails, just after
-// the wait.
+// The restart handoff no longer overlaps by design — the old process closes
+// the database (releasing this lock) and exits before its replacement is
+// started, in both spawn and supervised restart modes (Server/restart.go).
+// The retry survives as a safety net for the cases that can still race: a
+// supervisor relaunching the service while a wedged predecessor is being
+// backstop-killed, and the final old-style update from a release that still
+// spawned mid-drain. A genuinely concurrent long-lived second process still
+// fails, just after the wait.
 func acquireProcessLock(dbPath string) (release func(), err error) {
 	const (
 		retryFor   = 30 * time.Second
diff --git a/Server/listen_retry.go b/Server/listen_retry.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..a89faf9a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/listen_retry.go
@@ -0,0 +1,38 @@
+package main
+
+import (
+	"errors"
+	"log/slog"
+	"net/http"
+	"time"
+)
+
+// serveWithBindRetry runs serve, retrying bounded times while the failure is
+// an address-in-use bind conflict. http.ErrServerClosed (and nil) pass
+// straight through — those are clean shutdowns, not failures.
+//
+// This is a safety net, not part of the restart design: the restart handoff
+// releases the port before the successor starts (Server/restart.go), so the
+// retry only matters for external squatters, supervisor relaunch races
+// against a not-yet-dead predecessor, and platform TIME_WAIT edge cases.
+// bindRetryEvery spaces the bind retries; a var only so the give-up-bound
+// test doesn't sleep the real ~10 seconds.
+var bindRetryEvery = 500 * time.Millisecond
+
+func serveWithBindRetry(log *slog.Logger, label string, serve func() error) error {
+	const attempts = 20
+	var err error
+	for attempt := range attempts {
+		err = serve()
+		if err == nil || errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
+			return err
+		}
+		if attempt < attempts-1 && isAddrInUse(err) {
+			log.Warn("port in use, retrying...", "listener", label, "attempt", attempt+1, "error", err)
+			time.Sleep(bindRetryEvery)
+			continue
+		}
+		break
+	}
+	return err
+}
diff --git a/Server/main.go b/Server/main.go
index 17b898cf..47150efb 100644
--- a/Server/main.go
+++ b/Server/main.go
@@ -19,7 +19,6 @@ import (
 	"path/filepath"
 	"runtime"
 	"strconv"
-	"strings"
 	"syscall"
 	"time"
 
@@ -71,15 +70,41 @@ func main() {
 	log := slog.New(logctx.New(multiHandler))
 	slog.SetDefault(log)
 
-	if err := run(log, logBuf, levelVar); err != nil {
+	// The restart coordinator carries a self-restart request (update apply,
+	// backup restore, setup wizard) across run()'s teardown — see restart.go.
+	// The backstop closure fires only if a requested restart's drain wedges
+	// past restartBackstopDelay: it performs the handoff and force-exits,
+	// mirroring what the code below does on the healthy path.
+	var rc *restartCoordinator
+	rc = newRestartCoordinator(restartBackstopDelay, func() {
+		slog.Error("restart backstop fired — teardown exceeded its budget, exiting for handoff")
+		reason, _ := rc.Requested()
+		performRestartHandoff(reason, rc.Mode(), slog.Default())
+		os.Exit(0)
+	})
+
+	err := run(log, logBuf, levelVar, rc)
+	rc.disarm()
+
+	// Perform the handoff even when run() returned an error: a restart is
+	// only ever requested after a committed binary swap or a restore that
+	// closed the database, so not restarting is strictly worse than
+	// restarting into whatever the error was.
+	if reason, ok := rc.Requested(); ok {
+		performRestartHandoff(reason, rc.Mode(), log)
+	}
+
+	if err != nil {
 		_, _ = fmt.Fprintf(os.Stderr, "\n  [ERROR] %v\n\n", err)
 		log.Error("server exited with error", "error", err)
 		os.Exit(1)
 	}
 }
 
-// run is the real entrypoint — separated for testability.
-func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) error {
+// run is the real entrypoint — separated for testability. rc carries a
+// self-restart request out to main(), which performs the actual handoff once
+// everything here has drained (see restart.go).
+func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar, rc *restartCoordinator) error {
 	// bgCtx is a cancellable context shared by all background goroutines
 	// (event persister, event pruner, plugin loader, maintenance loop).
 	//
@@ -92,14 +117,27 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 	bgCtx, bgCancel := context.WithCancel(context.Background())
 	defer bgCancel()
 
-	// Clean up old binary from a previous update.
+	// Clean up old binary from a previous update. Bounded retry: in spawn
+	// mode the predecessor spawns this process as its very last act, so for
+	// the first few hundred milliseconds it may not have fully exited — and
+	// on Windows its image file (the .old after the swap) stays locked until
+	// it does.
 	exePath, exeErr := os.Executable()
 	if exeErr != nil {
 		log.Warn("failed to determine executable path", "error", exeErr)
 	} else {
 		oldPath := exePath + ".old"
 		if _, statErr := os.Stat(oldPath); statErr == nil {
-			if rmErr := os.Remove(oldPath); rmErr != nil {
+			var rmErr error
+			for attempt := range 5 {
+				if attempt > 0 {
+					time.Sleep(250 * time.Millisecond)
+				}
+				if rmErr = os.Remove(oldPath); rmErr == nil {
+					break
+				}
+			}
+			if rmErr != nil {
 				log.Warn("failed to remove old binary", "path", oldPath, "error", rmErr)
 			} else {
 				log.Info("removed old binary from previous update", "path", oldPath)
@@ -122,6 +160,11 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 		log.Warn("unknown logging.level, keeping info", "value", cfg.Logging.Level)
 	}
 
+	// Resolve how a self-restart hands off (spawn the replacement vs exit
+	// for a supervisor) now that config is loaded — main() reads it back
+	// after run() returns.
+	rc.SetMode(resolveRestartMode(cfg.Server.RestartMode, log))
+
 	// ── 2. Ensure data directory exists ────────────────────────────────────
 	if mkdirErr := os.MkdirAll(cfg.Server.DataDir, 0o750); mkdirErr != nil {
 		return fmt.Errorf("creating data dir %s: %w", cfg.Server.DataDir, mkdirErr)
@@ -167,6 +210,11 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 	// Backup handlers and the scheduled-backup maintenance write to the
 	// configured backup directory (defaults to data/backups).
 	admin.SetBackupDir(cfg.Backup.Dir)
+	// Admin restart requests (update apply, backup restore, setup wizard)
+	// land in the coordinator, which drains this process and lets main()
+	// perform the handoff. Wired before the listener starts serving, so no
+	// admin request can ever hit the unwired default hook.
+	admin.SetRestartHandoff(rc.Request)
 
 	if err := db.Migrate(database); err != nil {
 		return fmt.Errorf("running migrations: %w", err)
@@ -316,8 +364,8 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 		}
 		go func() {
 			log.Info("ACME HTTP challenge server starting on :80")
-			if err := acmeSrv.ListenAndServe(); err != nil && !errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
-				log.Error("ACME HTTP server error", "error", err)
+			if err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "acme-http", acmeSrv.ListenAndServe); err != nil && !errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
+				log.Error("ACME HTTP server error — HTTP-01 challenges and certificate renewal will fail until the next restart", "error", err)
 			}
 		}()
 	}
@@ -410,8 +458,12 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 		}
 	}()
 
-	// Listen for OS signals for graceful shutdown.
-	ctx, stop := signal.NotifyContext(context.Background(), os.Interrupt, syscall.SIGTERM)
+	// Listen for OS signals for graceful shutdown. The coordinator's context
+	// is the parent, so a programmatic restart request (rc.Request) drains
+	// exactly like a SIGTERM — including on Windows, where a process cannot
+	// signal itself. Signals arriving mid-drain are swallowed until stop()
+	// runs, same as on the real-signal path.
+	ctx, stop := signal.NotifyContext(rc.Context(), os.Interrupt, syscall.SIGTERM)
 	defer stop()
 
 	// Start serving in a goroutine.
@@ -419,23 +471,14 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 	go func() {
 		log.Info("server starting", "addr", addr, "tls", tlsCfg != nil, "version", version)
 
-		for attempt := range 20 {
-			var listenErr error
+		err := serveWithBindRetry(log, "server", func() error {
 			if tlsCfg != nil {
-				listenErr = srv.ListenAndServeTLS("", "")
-			} else {
-				listenErr = srv.ListenAndServe()
+				return srv.ListenAndServeTLS("", "")
 			}
-			if listenErr != nil && !errors.Is(listenErr, http.ErrServerClosed) {
-				// Check if it's an "address already in use" error (port not released yet from old process)
-				if attempt < 19 && isAddrInUse(listenErr) {
-					log.Warn("port in use, retrying...", "attempt", attempt+1, "error", listenErr)
-					time.Sleep(500 * time.Millisecond)
-					continue
-				}
-				serveErr <- listenErr
-			}
-			break
+			return srv.ListenAndServe()
+		})
+		if err != nil && !errors.Is(err, http.ErrServerClosed) {
+			serveErr <- err
 		}
 		close(serveErr)
 	}()
@@ -447,7 +490,11 @@ func run(log *slog.Logger, logBuf *admin.RingBuffer, levelVar *slog.LevelVar) er
 			return fmt.Errorf("server error: %w", err)
 		}
 	case <-ctx.Done():
-		log.Info("shutdown signal received, draining connections (30s timeout)")
+		if reason, ok := rc.Requested(); ok {
+			log.Info("restart requested, draining connections (30s timeout)", "reason", reason)
+		} else {
+			log.Info("shutdown signal received, draining connections (30s timeout)")
+		}
 	}
 
 	// Graceful shutdown.
@@ -645,11 +692,6 @@ func seedHubReplayState(ctx context.Context, hub *ws.Hub, database *db.DB, log *
 	hub.MarkVisibilityChanged()
 }
 
-// isAddrInUse checks if an error is an "address already in use" error.
-func isAddrInUse(err error) bool {
-	return err != nil && (strings.Contains(err.Error(), "address already in use") || strings.Contains(err.Error(), "Only one usage of each socket address"))
-}
-
 // printBanner writes the startup banner to stderr (so it doesn't mix with
 // the structured log output on stdout).
 func printBanner(cfg *config.Config, ver string, tls bool) {
diff --git a/Server/main_test.go b/Server/main_test.go
index c7260860..76f936bb 100644
--- a/Server/main_test.go
+++ b/Server/main_test.go
@@ -45,9 +45,13 @@ func TestRun_ServeErrorReturn_StopsHubDispatchGoroutine(t *testing.T) {
 
 	leakOpt := goleak.IgnoreCurrent()
 
-	if err := run(log, logBuf, levelVar); err == nil {
+	rc := newRestartCoordinator(time.Hour, nil)
+	if err := run(log, logBuf, levelVar, rc); err == nil {
 		t.Fatal("expected run() to return an error for an out-of-range port")
 	}
+	if _, requested := rc.Requested(); requested {
+		t.Error("no restart was requested, but the coordinator reports one")
+	}
 
 	// hub.Run's dispatch goroutine only exits once hub.stop is closed, which
 	// only happens inside hub.GracefulStop(). If run() returned without
diff --git a/Server/restart.go b/Server/restart.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..3f8447ac
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/restart.go
@@ -0,0 +1,189 @@
+// Restart coordination for self-restarts (update apply, backup restore,
+// setup wizard).
+//
+// The admin package never stops or spawns processes; it requests a restart
+// through admin.SetRestartHandoff, which lands in restartCoordinator.Request
+// here. Request cancels the parent context of run()'s signal.NotifyContext,
+// so the process drains through the exact same graceful path a SIGTERM takes
+// — including on Windows, where a process cannot deliver a signal to itself.
+// Only after run() has fully torn down (HTTP listeners closed, hub and
+// LiveKit stopped, queues flushed, database closed and its process lock
+// released) does main() perform the handoff: spawn the replacement binary
+// when self-managed, or just exit and let the process supervisor relaunch
+// the service. The old process being completely gone before the successor
+// starts is what makes the handoff deterministic — the DB-lock and bind
+// retries in db/ and main.go survive only as safety nets.
+package main
+
+import (
+	"context"
+	"log/slog"
+	"os"
+	"path/filepath"
+	"time"
+
+	"github.com/owncord/server/syncutil"
+	"github.com/owncord/server/updater"
+)
+
+const (
+	restartModeSpawn      = "spawn"
+	restartModeSupervised = "supervised"
+
+	// restartBackstopDelay bounds how long a requested restart may drain
+	// before the process force-exits (performing the handoff first). run()'s
+	// worst-case legitimate teardown is ≈55s — the 30s shutdown budget plus
+	// its sequential bounded defers — so 90s only ever fires on a genuinely
+	// wedged teardown. The successor's lock/bind retries absorb whatever a
+	// backstop exit leaves unreleased.
+	restartBackstopDelay = 90 * time.Second
+)
+
+// restartCoordinator owns the lifecycle of one restart request. It is
+// created in main(), threaded into run() (as a parameter, so tests drive
+// run() with their own instance), and consulted by main() again after run()
+// returns.
+type restartCoordinator struct {
+	ctx    context.Context
+	cancel context.CancelFunc
+
+	backstopDelay time.Duration
+	onBackstop    func()
+
+	mu        syncutil.Mutex
+	requested bool
+	reason    string
+	mode      string
+	backstop  *time.Timer
+}
+
+// newRestartCoordinator builds a coordinator whose Context() is the parent
+// for run()'s signal.NotifyContext. onBackstop runs once if a requested
+// restart's drain exceeds backstopDelay; production passes handoff+os.Exit,
+// tests pass a recorder.
+func newRestartCoordinator(backstopDelay time.Duration, onBackstop func()) *restartCoordinator {
+	ctx, cancel := context.WithCancel(context.Background())
+	return &restartCoordinator{
+		ctx:           ctx,
+		cancel:        cancel,
+		backstopDelay: backstopDelay,
+		onBackstop:    onBackstop,
+	}
+}
+
+// Context is the parent context for run()'s signal handling: cancelling it
+// (Request) is indistinguishable from a shutdown signal to everything
+// downstream. A Request issued before run() reaches NotifyContext is safe —
+// NotifyContext over an already-cancelled parent starts out done, and run()
+// falls straight through to graceful teardown.
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) Context() context.Context { return rc.ctx }
+
+// SetMode records the resolved restart mode ("spawn"/"supervised") once
+// config is loaded; Mode reads it back for the handoff.
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) SetMode(mode string) {
+	rc.mu.Lock()
+	rc.mode = mode
+	rc.mu.Unlock()
+}
+
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) Mode() string {
+	rc.mu.Lock()
+	defer rc.mu.Unlock()
+	return rc.mode
+}
+
+// Request records a restart request and starts the drain. Idempotent: the
+// first reason wins, duplicates are logged and dropped. Arms the backstop
+// timer before cancelling so a wedged teardown can never outlive it.
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) Request(reason string) {
+	rc.mu.Lock()
+	if rc.requested {
+		pending := rc.reason
+		rc.mu.Unlock()
+		slog.Info("restart already pending — duplicate request dropped",
+			"reason", reason, "pending_reason", pending)
+		return
+	}
+	rc.requested = true
+	rc.reason = reason
+	mode := rc.mode
+	if rc.onBackstop != nil {
+		rc.backstop = time.AfterFunc(rc.backstopDelay, rc.onBackstop)
+	}
+	rc.mu.Unlock()
+
+	slog.Info("restart requested — draining for handoff", "reason", reason, "mode", mode)
+	rc.cancel()
+}
+
+// Requested reports whether a restart was requested, and its reason.
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) Requested() (reason string, ok bool) {
+	rc.mu.Lock()
+	defer rc.mu.Unlock()
+	return rc.reason, rc.requested
+}
+
+// disarm stops the backstop timer. main() calls it the moment run() returns:
+// from there the handoff is in main()'s hands and a delayed force-exit would
+// only race it.
+func (rc *restartCoordinator) disarm() {
+	rc.mu.Lock()
+	if rc.backstop != nil {
+		rc.backstop.Stop()
+		rc.backstop = nil
+	}
+	rc.mu.Unlock()
+}
+
+// resolveRestartMode turns cfg.Server.RestartMode into the effective handoff
+// mode. Explicit "spawn"/"supervised" win; "auto" (or empty, or an unknown
+// value after a warning) detects: containers and supervised services exit
+// for their supervisor/engine to relaunch, everything else spawns its own
+// replacement.
+func resolveRestartMode(cfgVal string, log *slog.Logger) string {
+	switch cfgVal {
+	case restartModeSpawn, restartModeSupervised:
+		return cfgVal
+	case "", "auto":
+	default:
+		log.Warn("unknown server.restart_mode, using auto detection",
+			"value", cfgVal, "valid", "auto|spawn|supervised")
+	}
+	if updater.RunningInContainer() || updater.RunningUnderSupervisor() {
+		return restartModeSupervised
+	}
+	return restartModeSpawn
+}
+
+// spawnReplacement is the replacement-process spawner, swappable in tests
+// (which must not start real processes).
+var spawnReplacement = updater.SpawnDetached
+
+// performRestartHandoff completes a requested restart after run() has fully
+// drained. In supervised mode the handoff IS the exit — the supervisor
+// (systemd Restart=, NSSM AppExit, Docker restart policy) relaunches the
+// service, now running the swapped binary. In spawn mode the replacement is
+// started directly; every resource is already released, so the successor
+// boots with no lock or port contention. A failed spawn leaves the server
+// down — loudly logged; there is no hub left to notify clients through.
+func performRestartHandoff(reason, mode string, log *slog.Logger) {
+	if mode == restartModeSupervised {
+		log.Info("restart: exiting for the supervisor to relaunch", "reason", reason, "mode", mode)
+		return
+	}
+	exePath, err := os.Executable()
+	if err != nil {
+		log.Error("restart: cannot determine executable path — manual restart required",
+			"reason", reason, "error", err)
+		return
+	}
+	if resolved, symErr := filepath.EvalSymlinks(exePath); symErr == nil {
+		exePath = resolved
+	}
+	if err := spawnReplacement(exePath, os.Args[1:]); err != nil {
+		log.Error("restart: spawning the replacement process FAILED — manual restart required",
+			"reason", reason, "error", err)
+		return
+	}
+	log.Info("restart: replacement process spawned", "reason", reason, "path", exePath)
+}
diff --git a/Server/restart_test.go b/Server/restart_test.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..88255598
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/restart_test.go
@@ -0,0 +1,260 @@
+package main
+
+import (
+	"fmt"
+	"io"
+	"log/slog"
+	"net"
+	"net/http"
+	"os"
+	"os/signal"
+	"testing"
+	"time"
+
+	"go.uber.org/goleak"
+
+	"github.com/owncord/server/admin"
+)
+
+func TestRestartCoordinator_RequestIdempotent(t *testing.T) {
+	rc := newRestartCoordinator(time.Hour, nil)
+	defer rc.disarm()
+
+	if reason, ok := rc.Requested(); ok || reason != "" {
+		t.Fatalf("fresh coordinator Requested() = %q, %v; want none", reason, ok)
+	}
+
+	rc.Request("first")
+	rc.Request("second")
+
+	reason, ok := rc.Requested()
+	if !ok || reason != "first" {
+		t.Errorf("Requested() = %q, %v; want first reason to win", reason, ok)
+	}
+	select {
+	case <-rc.Context().Done():
+	default:
+		t.Error("coordinator context not cancelled after Request")
+	}
+}
+
+// Cancelling the coordinator's context must drive a signal.NotifyContext
+// built on top of it — that is the whole mechanism by which a restart
+// request drains run() exactly like a SIGTERM, on every platform.
+func TestRestartCoordinator_CancelDrivesNotifyContext(t *testing.T) {
+	rc := newRestartCoordinator(time.Hour, nil)
+	defer rc.disarm()
+
+	ctx, stop := signal.NotifyContext(rc.Context(), os.Interrupt)
+	defer stop()
+
+	rc.Request("test")
+
+	select {
+	case <-ctx.Done():
+	case <-time.After(2 * time.Second):
+		t.Fatal("NotifyContext not done after coordinator Request — restart requests would never drain the server")
+	}
+}
+
+func TestRestartCoordinator_Backstop(t *testing.T) {
+	t.Run("fires after the delay", func(t *testing.T) {
+		fired := make(chan struct{})
+		rc := newRestartCoordinator(10*time.Millisecond, func() { close(fired) })
+		rc.Request("test")
+		select {
+		case <-fired:
+		case <-time.After(2 * time.Second):
+			t.Fatal("backstop did not fire")
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("disarm stops it", func(t *testing.T) {
+		fired := make(chan struct{})
+		rc := newRestartCoordinator(50*time.Millisecond, func() { close(fired) })
+		rc.Request("test")
+		rc.disarm()
+		select {
+		case <-fired:
+			t.Fatal("backstop fired after disarm")
+		case <-time.After(200 * time.Millisecond):
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("not armed without a request", func(t *testing.T) {
+		fired := make(chan struct{})
+		_ = newRestartCoordinator(10*time.Millisecond, func() { close(fired) })
+		select {
+		case <-fired:
+			t.Fatal("backstop fired without a restart request")
+		case <-time.After(100 * time.Millisecond):
+		}
+	})
+}
+
+func TestResolveRestartMode(t *testing.T) {
+	log := slog.New(slog.NewTextHandler(io.Discard, nil))
+
+	// Pin every detector input: CI runners themselves can execute under
+	// systemd and carry a real INVOCATION_ID into the test process.
+	// present-but-empty counts as unset for all three.
+	pinBare := func(t *testing.T) {
+		t.Setenv("INVOCATION_ID", "")
+		t.Setenv("NSSM_SERVICE_NAME", "")
+		t.Setenv("OWNCORD_CONTAINER", "0")
+	}
+
+	t.Run("explicit values win over detection", func(t *testing.T) {
+		t.Setenv("INVOCATION_ID", "detected-supervisor")
+		if got := resolveRestartMode("spawn", log); got != restartModeSpawn {
+			t.Errorf("resolveRestartMode(spawn) = %q under systemd, want spawn", got)
+		}
+		pinBare(t)
+		if got := resolveRestartMode("supervised", log); got != restartModeSupervised {
+			t.Errorf("resolveRestartMode(supervised) = %q on bare metal, want supervised", got)
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("auto on bare metal spawns", func(t *testing.T) {
+		pinBare(t)
+		for _, v := range []string{"auto", "", "bogus-mode"} {
+			if got := resolveRestartMode(v, log); got != restartModeSpawn {
+				t.Errorf("resolveRestartMode(%q) = %q, want spawn", v, got)
+			}
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("auto under systemd is supervised", func(t *testing.T) {
+		pinBare(t)
+		t.Setenv("INVOCATION_ID", "4a1f3b0e9c8d4e2f")
+		if got := resolveRestartMode("auto", log); got != restartModeSupervised {
+			t.Errorf("resolveRestartMode(auto) = %q, want supervised", got)
+		}
+	})
+
+	t.Run("auto in a container is supervised", func(t *testing.T) {
+		pinBare(t)
+		t.Setenv("OWNCORD_CONTAINER", "1")
+		if got := resolveRestartMode("auto", log); got != restartModeSupervised {
+			t.Errorf("resolveRestartMode(auto) = %q, want supervised (restore/wizard restarts in Docker rely on the restart policy)", got)
+		}
+	})
+}
+
+func TestPerformRestartHandoff(t *testing.T) {
+	log := slog.New(slog.NewTextHandler(io.Discard, nil))
+
+	type call struct {
+		exe  string
+		args []string
+	}
+	var calls []call
+	prev := spawnReplacement
+	spawnReplacement = func(exePath string, args []string) error {
+		calls = append(calls, call{exePath, args})
+		return nil
+	}
+	defer func() { spawnReplacement = prev }()
+
+	performRestartHandoff("update", restartModeSupervised, log)
+	if len(calls) != 0 {
+		t.Fatalf("supervised handoff spawned a process: %+v — the supervisor owns the relaunch", calls)
+	}
+
+	performRestartHandoff("update", restartModeSpawn, log)
+	if len(calls) != 1 {
+		t.Fatalf("spawn handoff made %d spawn calls, want 1", len(calls))
+	}
+	if calls[0].exe == "" {
+		t.Error("spawn handoff passed an empty executable path")
+	}
+
+	// A failing spawn must be survivable (logged, no panic) — there is no
+	// hub left to notify at this point.
+	spawnReplacement = func(string, []string) error { return fmt.Errorf("injected spawn failure") }
+	performRestartHandoff("update", restartModeSpawn, log)
+}
+
+// TestRun_RestartRequest_DrainsCleanly drives run() end to end: boot on a
+// real port, request a restart through the coordinator (exactly what an
+// admin update/restore does via admin.SetRestartHandoff), and assert run()
+// drains and returns nil with no leaked goroutines — the property main()'s
+// post-run handoff depends on (DB closed and lock released, port free,
+// LiveKit stopped) before it starts the successor.
+func TestRun_RestartRequest_DrainsCleanly(t *testing.T) {
+	t.Chdir(t.TempDir())
+
+	// Grab a free port, release it, and hand it to run(). The tiny window
+	// where something else could take it is absorbed by run()'s bind retry.
+	l, err := net.Listen("tcp", "127.0.0.1:0")
+	if err != nil {
+		t.Fatalf("probe listen: %v", err)
+	}
+	port := l.Addr().(*net.TCPAddr).Port
+	_ = l.Close()
+
+	t.Setenv("OWNCORD_SERVER_PORT", fmt.Sprint(port))
+	t.Setenv("OWNCORD_TLS_MODE", "off")
+	t.Setenv("OWNCORD_VOICE_AUTO_DOWNLOAD_LIVEKIT", "false") // keep the test offline
+
+	logBuf := admin.NewRingBuffer(64)
+	levelVar := new(slog.LevelVar)
+	log := slog.New(slog.NewTextHandler(io.Discard, &slog.HandlerOptions{Level: levelVar}))
+
+	leakOpt := goleak.IgnoreCurrent()
+
+	rc := newRestartCoordinator(time.Hour, nil)
+	runErr := make(chan error, 1)
+	go func() { runErr <- run(log, logBuf, levelVar, rc) }()
+
+	// Wait for the server to actually serve before requesting the restart.
+	healthURL := fmt.Sprintf("http://127.0.0.1:%d/health", port)
+	up := false
+	for deadline := time.Now().Add(15 * time.Second); time.Now().Before(deadline); {
+		resp, healthErr := http.Get(healthURL) //nolint:gosec // G107: loopback URL built from the test's own port
+		if healthErr == nil {
+			_, _ = io.Copy(io.Discard, resp.Body)
+			_ = resp.Body.Close()
+			up = true
+			break
+		}
+		select {
+		case err := <-runErr:
+			t.Fatalf("run() exited before serving: %v", err)
+		case <-time.After(50 * time.Millisecond):
+		}
+	}
+	if !up {
+		t.Fatal("server never became reachable on /health")
+	}
+
+	rc.Request("test-restart")
+
+	select {
+	case err := <-runErr:
+		if err != nil {
+			t.Fatalf("run() after restart request = %v, want nil (clean drain)", err)
+		}
+	case <-time.After(60 * time.Second):
+		t.Fatal("run() did not return after the restart request")
+	}
+	rc.disarm()
+
+	if reason, ok := rc.Requested(); !ok || reason != "test-restart" {
+		t.Errorf("Requested() = %q, %v; want the recorded restart", reason, ok)
+	}
+
+	// Everything must have drained: this is the guarantee that lets main()
+	// start the successor with zero lock/port contention.
+	if err := goleak.Find(leakOpt); err != nil {
+		t.Errorf("goroutines leaked after a restart-request drain: %v", err)
+	}
+
+	// The port must actually be free again.
+	relisten, err := net.Listen("tcp", fmt.Sprintf("127.0.0.1:%d", port))
+	if err != nil {
+		t.Errorf("port still held after drain: %v", err)
+	} else {
+		_ = relisten.Close()
+	}
+}
diff --git a/Server/updater/supervisor.go b/Server/updater/supervisor.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..b2dabc58
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/updater/supervisor.go
@@ -0,0 +1,27 @@
+package updater
+
+import "os"
+
+// RunningUnderSupervisor reports whether the server appears to be running
+// under a process supervisor that will relaunch it after a clean exit. It
+// decides how a self-restart (update apply, backup restore, setup wizard)
+// hands off: under a supervisor the server just exits and lets the supervisor
+// start the new binary; unsupervised it spawns the replacement itself.
+//
+// Detected supervisors:
+//   - systemd: INVOCATION_ID is set for every process systemd starts as a
+//     unit (v232+). Interactive shells are started by terminal emulators,
+//     not by the service manager, so they do not carry it.
+//   - NSSM: NSSM_SERVICE_NAME. NSSM 2.24 (the release the deployment docs
+//     install) does NOT set this for the service process — only newer
+//     pre-releases do — so NSSM deployments must set
+//     OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE=supervised explicitly (docs/deployment.md).
+//     The check stays because it makes future NSSM releases work unconfigured.
+//
+// This is only the auto-detection half of the decision: server.restart_mode
+// ("spawn"/"supervised") overrides it in both directions, and containers
+// (RunningInContainer) are treated as supervised by the caller because the
+// engine's restart policy is what relaunches PID 1.
+func RunningUnderSupervisor() bool {
+	return os.Getenv("INVOCATION_ID") != "" || os.Getenv("NSSM_SERVICE_NAME") != ""
+}
diff --git a/Server/updater/supervisor_test.go b/Server/updater/supervisor_test.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..3e789d46
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/updater/supervisor_test.go
@@ -0,0 +1,34 @@
+package updater
+
+import "testing"
+
+// Non-empty INVOCATION_ID (systemd) or NSSM_SERVICE_NAME (NSSM) means
+// supervised; empty counts as unset. Both are pinned empty in the negative
+// case because CI runners themselves can execute under systemd and carry a
+// real INVOCATION_ID into the test process.
+func TestRunningUnderSupervisor(t *testing.T) {
+	cases := []struct {
+		name         string
+		invocationID string
+		nssmService  string
+		want         bool
+	}{
+		{"bare (both empty)", "", "", false},
+		{"systemd", "4a1f3b0e9c8d4e2f8a7b6c5d4e3f2a1b", "", true},
+		{"nssm", "", "OwnCord", true},
+		{"both", "abc", "OwnCord", true},
+	}
+	for _, tc := range cases {
+		t.Run(tc.name, func(t *testing.T) {
+			// t.Setenv with "" makes the variable present-but-empty, which the
+			// non-empty check treats exactly like unset — the same trick
+			// container_test.go relies on for hermetic negatives.
+			t.Setenv("INVOCATION_ID", tc.invocationID)
+			t.Setenv("NSSM_SERVICE_NAME", tc.nssmService)
+			if got := RunningUnderSupervisor(); got != tc.want {
+				t.Errorf("RunningUnderSupervisor() = %v, want %v (INVOCATION_ID=%q NSSM_SERVICE_NAME=%q)",
+					got, tc.want, tc.invocationID, tc.nssmService)
+			}
+		})
+	}
+}
diff --git a/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux.go b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..a469ebcb
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux.go
@@ -0,0 +1,19 @@
+//go:build linux
+
+package ws
+
+import "syscall"
+
+// liveKitSysProcAttr asks the kernel to SIGKILL the companion livekit-server
+// if this process dies without running its own teardown (kill -9, OOM kill,
+// a wedged shutdown force-exited by the restart backstop). The normal stop
+// path is still LiveKitProcess.Stop via hub.GracefulStop — this only closes
+// the hole where an orphaned livekit-server keeps TCP 7880 and the UDP media
+// range bound, crash-looping the successor's LiveKit until someone kills the
+// orphan by hand.
+//
+// Pdeathsig is Linux-only (prctl PR_SET_PDEATHSIG); other platforms return
+// nil and rely on the graceful path alone.
+func liveKitSysProcAttr() *syscall.SysProcAttr {
+	return &syscall.SysProcAttr{Pdeathsig: syscall.SIGKILL}
+}
diff --git a/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux_test.go b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux_test.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..eb14cc9a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_linux_test.go
@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+//go:build linux
+
+package ws
+
+import (
+	"syscall"
+	"testing"
+)
+
+// The companion livekit-server must die with a parent that never ran its
+// teardown (kill -9, OOM, backstop force-exit): without Pdeathsig the orphan
+// keeps 7880/UDP bound and the successor's LiveKit crash-loops.
+func TestLiveKitSysProcAttr_SetsPdeathsig(t *testing.T) {
+	attr := liveKitSysProcAttr()
+	if attr == nil {
+		t.Fatal("liveKitSysProcAttr() = nil on linux, want Pdeathsig attr")
+	}
+	if attr.Pdeathsig != syscall.SIGKILL {
+		t.Errorf("Pdeathsig = %v, want SIGKILL", attr.Pdeathsig)
+	}
+}
diff --git a/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_other.go b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_other.go
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..3ba0b777
--- /dev/null
+++ b/Server/ws/livekit_procattr_other.go
@@ -0,0 +1,14 @@
+//go:build !linux
+
+package ws
+
+import "syscall"
+
+// liveKitSysProcAttr returns nil: parent-death signaling (Pdeathsig) is a
+// Linux prctl feature. On Windows and macOS the companion livekit-server is
+// stopped only by the graceful path (LiveKitProcess.Stop via
+// hub.GracefulStop); a Windows job object would be the equivalent hardening
+// and is deliberately out of scope here.
+func liveKitSysProcAttr() *syscall.SysProcAttr {
+	return nil
+}
diff --git a/Server/ws/livekit_process.go b/Server/ws/livekit_process.go
index f5a513cf..da3d6c3c 100644
--- a/Server/ws/livekit_process.go
+++ b/Server/ws/livekit_process.go
@@ -261,6 +261,12 @@ func (p *LiveKitProcess) runLoop(ctx context.Context, cfgPath, binPath string) {
 		cmd.Stdout = os.Stdout
 		cmd.Stderr = os.Stderr
 		cmd.WaitDelay = 6 * time.Second // bound Wait to prevent goroutine leak on Windows
+		if attr := liveKitSysProcAttr(); attr != nil {
+			// Linux: die with a parent that never ran its teardown (kill -9,
+			// OOM, restart-backstop force-exit) instead of orphaning with
+			// 7880/UDP still bound.
+			cmd.SysProcAttr = attr
+		}
 
 		slog.Info("livekit: starting process",
 			"binary", binPath,
diff --git a/deploy/owncord.service b/deploy/owncord.service
index f4ad6e66..234adb85 100644
--- a/deploy/owncord.service
+++ b/deploy/owncord.service
@@ -21,8 +21,17 @@ User=owncord
 Group=owncord
 WorkingDirectory=/opt/owncord
 ExecStart=/opt/owncord/chatserver
-Restart=on-failure
+# always, not on-failure: the server exits 0 ON PURPOSE after an admin-panel
+# self-update, backup restore, or setup-wizard change, expecting systemd to
+# relaunch it (now running the swapped binary). `systemctl stop` is unaffected
+# — systemd never auto-restarts an explicitly stopped unit. Failure exits
+# (e.g. the WebSocket dispatch panic breaker, exit 1) restart the same as
+# they did under on-failure.
+Restart=always
 RestartSec=3
+# A crash-looping binary still trips systemd's start limit (default 5 starts
+# in 10s) and parks the unit as failed; raise StartLimitIntervalSec /
+# StartLimitBurst in [Unit] if you want a longer leash.
 
 # The server drains gracefully on SIGTERM with a 30s budget; give it a little
 # headroom before systemd escalates to SIGKILL.
diff --git a/docs/deployment.md b/docs/deployment.md
index cf3c4040..7b789247 100644
--- a/docs/deployment.md
+++ b/docs/deployment.md
@@ -104,6 +104,13 @@ image sets `OWNCORD_CONTAINER=1` to mark this; operators who bind-mount the
 server binary into a container and genuinely want in-place self-update can
 set `OWNCORD_CONTAINER=0` to opt back in.
 
+The admin panel's backup **restore** (and a setup-wizard restart) does work
+in containers: the server drains and exits cleanly, relying on the
+container's restart policy to relaunch it. The shipped `docker-compose.yml`
+sets `restart: unless-stopped`, which covers this; if you run the container
+by hand, pass `--restart unless-stopped` or the restore leaves the container
+stopped.
+
 ### LiveKit in Docker
 
 LiveKit runs as its own container (`livekit/livekit-server:v1`) and is **not** managed by OwnCord's companion-process system. Leave `voice.livekit_binary` unset. See [LiveKit Setup — Docker](livekit-setup.md#docker) for details.
@@ -148,9 +155,17 @@ supervisor. A ready-made unit template ships in the repo at
 [`deploy/owncord.service`](../deploy/owncord.service); installation steps are
 in its header comments. The important choices it encodes:
 
-- `Restart=on-failure` — the server deliberately exits (rather than limping
-  along) when its WebSocket dispatch loop dies; the supervisor is what turns
-  that into a recovery.
+- `Restart=always` — two deliberate exits rely on it: the server exits
+  nonzero (rather than limping along) when its WebSocket dispatch loop dies,
+  and it exits **cleanly** after an admin-panel self-update, backup restore,
+  or setup-wizard restart, expecting systemd to relaunch it running the
+  swapped binary (the server auto-detects systemd via `INVOCATION_ID` and
+  hands off this way instead of spawning a child that the unit's cgroup
+  cleanup would kill). `systemctl stop` still stops it — systemd never
+  auto-restarts an explicitly stopped unit. **Update the unit file before
+  applying server updates from the admin panel** — it also repairs the
+  update handoff when updating from older OwnCord releases, whose spawned
+  replacement gets reaped by the cgroup cleanup.
 - `TimeoutStopSec=35` — the server drains gracefully on SIGTERM with a 30s
   budget; systemd waits it out before escalating.
 - `ReadWritePaths=/opt/owncord` under `ProtectSystem=strict` — the install
@@ -178,6 +193,12 @@ nssm set OwnCord AppDirectory "C:\OwnCord"
 nssm set OwnCord DisplayName "OwnCord Chat Server"
 nssm set OwnCord Start SERVICE_AUTO_START
 
+# REQUIRED: tell the server NSSM supervises it. On a self-update/restore the
+# server then exits cleanly and NSSM's default AppExit=Restart relaunches it
+# with the new binary. (NSSM 2.24 is not auto-detectable, so without this the
+# server spawns its own replacement, which races NSSM's relaunch.)
+nssm set OwnCord AppEnvironmentExtra OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE=supervised
+
 # Manage
 nssm start OwnCord
 nssm stop OwnCord
@@ -193,6 +214,10 @@ nssm restart OwnCord
 5. Check "Run whether user is logged on or not"
 6. Check "Run with highest privileges"
 
+Task Scheduler starts the process but does not supervise it, so leave
+`server.restart_mode` on its default (`auto` resolves to `spawn` here): on a
+self-update or restore the server starts its own replacement after draining.
+
 ## TLS Setup
 
 ### Self-Signed (default)
@@ -430,7 +455,17 @@ The server checks GitHub Releases for updates:
 - Downloads `chatserver.exe` with detached Ed25519/minisign signature verification
 - Verifies a signed `server-update-manifest.json` that binds the binary hash to the release version
 - Cross-checks the binary SHA256 against `checksums.sha256`
-- On restart, the current binary is rotated to `chatserver.exe.old` before the new binary takes its place
+
+Applying an update then runs in this order: the current binary is rotated to
+`chatserver.exe.old` and the verified download takes its place; connected
+clients get a "restarting in 5s" notice; the server drains completely
+(HTTP listeners, WebSocket hub, the companion `livekit-server`, queued
+event/audit writes, the database and its process lock); and only then does
+the handoff happen — the server either starts the new binary itself or, under
+a supervisor (systemd/NSSM/Docker, see `server.restart_mode` in
+[Server Configuration](server-configuration.md)), exits cleanly so the
+supervisor relaunches it. Because the old process is fully gone before the
+new one starts, the successor boots with no port or database-lock contention.
 
 Set `github.token` in config for higher API rate limits (5000/hr vs 60/hr unauthenticated).
 
diff --git a/docs/server-configuration.md b/docs/server-configuration.md
index ce2567ae..ffd2db04 100644
--- a/docs/server-configuration.md
+++ b/docs/server-configuration.md
@@ -42,6 +42,7 @@ the server automatically when a startup-only value changed. Note that
 | `server.waf_enabled` | bool | `false` | Enable the Coraza WAF middleware (inline rules + OWASP Core Rule Set) |
 | `server.waf_paranoia_level` | int | `2` | OWASP CRS paranoia level 1–4; values outside that range fall back to 2 |
 | `server.waf_crs_mode` | string | `"detect"` | CRS layer mode: `off` (inline rules only), `detect` (matches logged, never blocks), `block` (anomaly-scoring blocking). Unknown values fall back to `detect`. |
+| `server.restart_mode` | string | `"auto"` | How self-restarts (update apply, backup restore, setup wizard) hand off after the server drains: `supervised` exits cleanly and relies on systemd/NSSM/Docker to relaunch; `spawn` starts the replacement binary directly; `auto` picks `supervised` when a supervisor or container is detected, else `spawn`. NSSM deployments must set `supervised` explicitly (see [Deployment](deployment.md)). |
 
 ### TLS (`tls`)
 
@@ -190,6 +191,7 @@ absent from the table below (it is a representative subset, not the full list).
 | `OWNCORD_SERVER_PORT` | `server.port` |
 | `OWNCORD_SERVER_NAME` | `server.name` |
 | `OWNCORD_SERVER_DATA_DIR` | `server.data_dir` |
+| `OWNCORD_SERVER_RESTART_MODE` | `server.restart_mode` |
 | `OWNCORD_DATABASE_PATH` | `database.path` |
 | `OWNCORD_TLS_MODE` | `tls.mode` |
 | `OWNCORD_TLS_CERT_FILE` | `tls.cert_file` |